welcome to the hellscape of d00m3dang3l. enjoy ur stay.

“Ignorance is bliss. Happiness is ambition. Desolation is knowledge. Pain is acceptance. Despair is anger. Denial is helpless. Martyrdom is hope for others. Advantages taken are causes of martyrdom. Revenge is sorrow. Death is a reprieve. Life is a punishment. Others' achievements are tormentations. People are alike. I am different.” - VoDkA

“me is a god, a god of sadness, exiled to this eternal hell. The people i helped, abandon me. i am denied what i want, to love & to be happy. Being made a human without the possibility of BEING human. The cruellest of all punishments. To some i am crazy. It is so clear, yet so foggy. Everything's connected, seperated. i am the only interpreter of this. i'd rather have nothing than be nothing. Some say godliness isn't nothing. Humanity is the something i long for. i just want something I can never have. The story of my existence.” -VoDkA

I am but an angsty individual, ranting on the internet. Don't take me seriously lol. Feel free 2 chat me up if ur having the big sad, or if u just wanna talk :)


Currently reading: The Red Dragon, Death Note, Wintergirls, Paperweights, Six of Crows, Satanic Bible

Currently watching: AHS:MH, Demon Slayer, Death Note, BNHA, Jujitsu Kaisen, Tokyo Ghoul

Concerts Imma see in '21: KMFDM/MINISTRY (10/03), SLIPKNOT/BMTH (11/05)

Currently listening to: Nowhere to Run - Stegosaurus Rex, BLOODMONEY - Poppy, the only snipits of Shinigami Eyes - Grimes we have

I have rules in this life that I live.

1. Everything is subjective. No, I don't condone rape, murder, etc. But everyone thinks they're the hero of their story. People will do horrible things for what they think are the right reasons. In that way, be firm in your beliefs, but realize that YOUR beliefs aren't universal, by any means.

2. Never copy. Life is about learning. Learn a new way and make it your own. I live by the phrase "Make your idols your rivals." Create YOUR own world. Be YOUR own god.

3. Treat people with dignity and respect. You never know who's struggling.

4. This is YOUR life. Don't waste it doing something you don't want to do. I know that may sound scary, but no one should be living your life for you. FUCK THEM ALL. Do what you want.

Full name: Jay Martinez, a variation of my real name, which may never be known….

Nicknames: JJ, J Dog, The Sadman, Jules, J, Julio

Birthplace: Albuquerque, NM, USA

Birthday: December 10, 2000

Where Do You Live Now?: Da same ol place lol

Parent(s): Mom n Padre

Sibling(s): Dat little shit Olivia

Looks: 5’5, Dark brown/black hair fading to white at the bottom, glasses (sumtimez)

Favorite Animal(s): I am a Cat Supremacist

Favorite TV Show(s): BNHA, AHS (mainly just Murder House tho), Death Note

Favorite Kind(s) Of Music: Industrial, techno, all da emo shiz (MCR, BMTH etc, grunge)

Favorite Movie(s): Natural Born Killers, MCU films, Us, Scream, Silence of the Lambs

School: Uni lolz

Future School: Mayhaps law school??

Future Job: Concept illustrator or animator

Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Nada, I don’t leave my house enough 4 this

Best Buds: E, M, B, and all da goofz @ work

Favorite Candy: Milky Way

Hobbies: Shooting w friends, reading, drawing, sleppin, writing

Things You Collect: Stuffed animals, rocks, and Monster Energy cans :^)

Do You Have A Personal Phone Line: Obvs lol this is the 21st century

Favorite Body Part Of The Opposite Sex: Uhhhh cheekbones? Also dudes w the long fluffy hair !!

Any Tattoos And Where Of What?: None yet :( I wanna get some shiz on my hands @ sum point tho

Piercing(s) And Where?: 1 single piercing. On my left ear

What Do You Sleep in?: A thick ass hoodie and sweatpants w fuzzy sox. Regardless of the weather

Do you like Chain Letters: IDEK what that is lmfao

Best Advice: YOLO, Ask for forgiveness rather than permission, If it’s a chain, it’s free reign

Favorite Quotes: And now you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good, I must be crazy to fight this war. I must be out of my battered mind

Non-sport Activity You Enjoy: Racing (even tho my jeep is 3k lbs), shooting, off-roading


Favorite Thing To Do In Spring: Plant my garden, go for long walks n listen to music

What’s Your Bedtime: I try to be out by 11-12, but sumtimes it’s like 2 or 3 lol

Where Do You Shop?: Hot Topic, thrift stores, Depop

Coke or Pepsi: Coke

Favorite Thing(s) To Wear?: Black skinny jeans, band tees, backwards baseball caps/beanies, mah trench coat, chokers, the Everlasting Contrast necklace

Favorite Subject(s) In School?: Art, English, Sociology, Criminal Justice, Dance, Computer Science

Favorite Color(s): Red, black, purple

Favorite People To Talk To Online: E mostly

Root-Beer or Dr. Pepper? Root beer

Do You Shave? Whenever I feel like it. I’m lazy

Favorite Vacation Spot(s): THE BEACH

Favorite Family Member(s): My cat n my lil sis

Did You Eat Paint Chips When You Were a Kid? Maybe?

Favorite CD you own: The Downward Spiral

The ONE Person Who You Hate The Most: Not rlly a person, more of an entity...but the zombie like humanity that I see more and more everyday

Favorite Food(s): Ramen, miso soup, veggie chilie

Who Is The Hottest Guy or Girl In The World?: Halsey and Avril Lavigne

What Is Your Favorite Salad Dressing?: I prefer no dressing lol

When You Die, Do You Wanna Be Buried or Burned Into Ashes? Set on fucking fireeee

Do You Believe In Aliens?: Yes. You’d be arrogant and ignorant not to

If You Had The Chance To Professionally Do Something, What would You Do?: Ballet dancer would be fun. Or a writer

Things You Obsess Over: Anime, guns, true crime shit, music, angsty sad boi bad bois (lookin @ u Bucky)

Favorite Day of the Week: Friday and Saturday

A Teacher You Hate: Currently my sociology prof :))))

Favorite Disney Movie: COCO !!

What Is Your Favorite Season? Fall and summer

What Toppings Do You Like On Your Pizza? I h8 pizza so much lmfao

Do You Like Your School Food Itself (As In The District Food): Idk I always brought my lunch to school in hs

If You Could Live Anywhere, Where Would You Live? Japan, Italy, or Spain

Favorite Thing(s) To Do On Weekends: Go out w E, listen to music, draw, code shit, go shooting

Favorite Thing(s) To Get Cleaned up: Wash my face, brush my teeth, clean my room

Favorite Magazine(s): Vogue, Elle, all that shiz, any gun magazines, art/photography zines

Favorite Flower(s): Lavender, daisy

Favorite Number(s): 1111, 444, 666

Favorite Ice Cream flavor(s): Strawberry

What Kind of Guys/Girls Are You Attracted to?: Girlz who like the same shit I do lol

What’s Your Most Embarrassing Moment? When I got sussed for “making a threat on the school” when I was 15. I didn’t even do anything lol

If You Could Change One Thing About Yourself What Would It be? My weight

Do You Eat Breakfast First Then Brush Your Teeth or Brush first ten eat breakfast: Breakfast, then teeth

Favorite Time of Day: 5:30-6 am in the summertime

Can A Guy and Girl Be Just “Best Friends?”: Duh lol

Do You Ask The Girl / Guy Out Or Do You Wait For Them To Come To You?: Depends

Do You Mind Paying For Sex? Idk lol mayhaps...

What’s The Most Important thing In Someone’s Personality: Not being a liTTLE BITCH

Do you have a pager or cell phone? Cell phone

Favorite Sport: Running, boxing, hiking

What Was the Best Gift You Ever Received? My literal gaming computer

How Long Did This Letter Take You To Finish?: Like 15-20 min

What Did You Listen To While Completing It?: Blurryface album. I unironically love TØP

Are you or would you like to be married in the near future (next 5 years)? I feel like I’ll probably be dead within the next 6 years so idk prolly no one

Don’t u just hate how psychics never win the lottery? Maybe they do win, but they let the unfortunate mortals take the earnings lol